Review by PDA
6/9/2006
it, as she had this happy look on her face. I did not really want to see it as I
could tell it was a chick flick. So why did I say I wanted to see it…because I
had to pay some pussy taxes that were long overdue and one of the easiest
ways to wipe out a big debt of pussy taxes is to go see a chick flick.
Hollywood is doing an excellent job of disguising chick flicks these days. At
first glance, you might not think The Breakup is not a chick flick because it has
Hollywood’s preeminent guy’s guy: Vincent Vaughn. This begs the question:
why is this a chick flick? Here is what makes it a chick flick (to be qualified as
a chick flick it only needs one of these):
1) The movie is the story of a couple
2) It features some Hollywood-metrosexual type (a.k.a: closet homosexual)
3) It is playing at an art house theater and you have never heard of it
4) It is about two guys ramming each other
Therefore this movie qualifies as it is about a couple.
The best thing to do when you are going to see a chick flick is not to complain
or bring it up too much because the more you do the less debt gets wiped out
or heaven forbid you actually enjoy the movie and then it gets thrown back at
you and doesn't even count towards paying pussy taxes. I almost made that
mistake because I wanted to see Xmen 3 real bad but I knew I had a huge
pussy tax debt. So I never brought up Xmen and instead suggested The
Breakup.
It turns out The Breakup wasn't one of those chick flicks that makes me want
to gag. It actually had parts I really liked where the guy wasn't acting like pussy
guys do in chick flicks; he was acting like a real guy.
Also, even though it’s probably a body double, there is a great shot of Jennifer
Anniston’s ass.
Jon Faverau (pussy guy in Swingers) plays Vaughn’s buddy. The characters
are basically reversed from Swingers (this was a stretch for Faverau I assume)
as Vaughn is a bit of a pussy while Faverau plays the funny tough guy.
Turning an actor like Vaughn into a pussy qualifies this as a chick flick as well.
When the movie was over, something overcame me and anyone who knows
me could see this happening: I used my booming voice and said, "Okay, how
many guys are here because they had to be?!!!" Many laughed out loud
destroying their chance for a huge pussy tax write off while others felt the gaze
of their GF’s/wives saying don’t you dare laugh.
I went to take a piss and I got a standing ovation in the bathroom (of course
they were already standing but you get the point).
